Tag Archives: limericks

On Day Six… #limerick

Esther has prompted with ‘neck’ and this is the result… A furious God held the first scrotum In front of his hapless factotum. ‘Why didn’t you check? They’ve used turkey neck. And what use is an opposable bum?’

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Limericks: Those Awkward Rhymes

This week’s prompt is ‘church’ from Esther When an ascetic churchwarden, called Bunt Found out what they’d done to his punt Which was covered in baubles He said, ‘Bless my corbels; Whoever did this must be some sort of an … Continue reading

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Fishing For Compliments #limerick

This week’s prompt from Esther is ‘fell’ At his first appraisal, long after he fellLucifer stood before the Hounds of Hell:‘How am I doing, throw me a bone,A bit more fire, a smidge of brimstone?’And Cerberus slathered: ‘It’s too early … Continue reading

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Fruit Pickings, The Dangers Of: A Limerick

Esther’s prompt this week is ‘Blind’ ‘Buying fruit,’ young Thomas opined,‘Is a risky business if you’re partially blind;The staff all think I’m utterly hopelessAnd one old woman told me to grope less,Cos I can’t tell ripe melons from a pert … Continue reading

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Sweary Limerick

To me, it’s neither here, nor thereWhether people feel the need to swear.They can call me poltroonOr odious buffoonAnd I’ll barely turn the odd hair. When young, with nary a careI had little need to swear.But as I developed some … Continue reading

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Limerick Advice To The Older Man

Based on Esther’s prompt, here – this week Joke As an elderly, colourless blokeI’ve become a bit of a joke;But since I’ve found my lost youth,Wrapped up in its own truthI’m mindful and just a tad woke.

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Limerick For The Fittest

Gym Nastic found that working out,Left him tired with a permanent pout.His hopes of love, barely a glimmer,Became as naught, as he became slimmerWith perfect abs and the face of a trout. Based on Esther’s Limerick prompt gym

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Cool: Limerick

Buff Sixpack knew he was coolAs he posed in the gym and the pool;He thought his hot bodWould make girls think him god;Instead all they saw was a tool. Based On Esther’s prompt

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That Limerick Time

A comic, when young and quite greenThought nothing of being obscene;But a life so spleneticCan become quite frenetic.Sadly his act is now clean.

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Don’t Try This At Home: A(nother) Limerick

Belinda Blande was an Olympic Class boreWhose monotone chatter made Norman’s head sore.Even in bed, with all limbs gyratingHer passionate cries, he found enervating.So he covered his head and pretended to snore.

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