Happy Xmas (Pullover) (with apologies to Happy Xmas (War is Over))
So Granny’s knitwear
What has she done?
Another bloody pullover
From wool that’s homespun.
So this is her knitwear
I hope she’s had some fun
The pattern’s the weirdest yet
Even for her grandson.
Why every Christmas
Does she knit this gear?
It’s never a good one.
I need a beer.
And so this is her knitwear
The pattern’s far too strong
Too rich for my poor eyes
Why can’t she just yarnbomb?
And so another pullover.
Why not black and white? (I’d love it)
Rather than yellow and red (pullovers)
Or even some socks or tights?
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About TanGental
My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published several books: a four book series following Harry Spittle as he grows from hapless student to hapless partner in a London law firm; four others in different genres; a book of poetry; four anthologies of short fiction; and a memoir of my mother. I have several more in the pipeline.
I have been blogging regularly since 2014, on topic as diverse as: poetry based on famous poems; memories from my life; my garden; my dog; a whole variety of short fiction; my attempts at baking and food; travel and the consequent disasters; theatre, film and book reviews; and the occasional thought piece. Mostly it is whatever takes my fancy.
I avoid politics, mostly, and religion, always. I don't mean to upset anyone but if I do, well, sorry and I suggest you go elsewhere.
These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
TanGental 
To the same tune.
Oh! you’re so ungrateful
But that was so fun
Thank God for my grandsons
Knitting not my idea of fun!
Great poem Geoff love it!
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Could’ve been worse. Could’ve been red and green…
Have a cool Yule!
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It almost certainly wil be
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You appear to have taken the needle, Geoff. Merry Christmas (knitwear)!
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Thanks George. You too
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War is never over on this planet!
How about a Cricket Christmas jumper?
Our grandmother always sent us lovely presents – I think I still have a lovely Fair Isle beret she made somewhere, too small now, of course.
Hope preparations for everything are going well and the tree lights have not exploded, causing consternation with Dog and the cats!
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All well. Too much food in prospect though,which I’m not complaining about. Hope you have fun
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Good all well. In Molesworth, “the xmas puding xplode with a huge crash and the cat spring up the curtains”.
So ding-dong farely merily for xmas 🎄 to all.
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Yep all v jolly with japes galore.
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Hanging on by a thread there, eh?
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Oh v drole!
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Aw, I wanted to see this masterpiece!
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Fortunately it’s fiction so no pictures
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I’d like photos! Your poem makes me laugh. Thank goodness I don’t crochet, right? If I ever learn, I’ll send you a pullover!
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Very kind. I can’t wait !
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😵💫😵💫😵💫🤓🎁🤶🏻
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This is already trending in Monrovia!
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I might have to emigrate
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Good ole Gran
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None of my relatives knitted. It was all crochet, and that’s tougher to do ugly sweaters with. Of course there are the throws, but…
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hahahaha The sad part: One day we all pull one of granny’s special out, wear it, and then wonder when we started to like it.
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That’s true
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A hum dinger. Now I’ve got an earworm.
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Me, too.
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I think this poem would have given Lennon a giggle! He did have an obtuse side!
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Happy holidays, Geoff!
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Haha! Ah, but now you have plenty of exhibits to start a sweater museum.
Have a cool Yule, Geoff. Hugs.
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Thanks Teagan. Feeling v fat…
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Love it, Geoff. The song, that is, I hasten to add. I’d forego the pullover.
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Pullover madness is now over for a year phew!
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Clever! I enjoyed that. Singing it in my head to your words.
🤣🤣🤣
Merry Christmas to you and yours.
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And to you.
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Poor Gram! Happy Christmas to you!
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Love this, Geoff. I hope you had a lovely Christmas. Best to you in the new year ahead.
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Thanks Jennie. Yes all the family was around so we had a grand break. The last three days I’ve been working in a homeless shelter which has been both moving and uplifting.
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Way to go, Geoff! I bet it was moving and uplifting. Doing something good has such a wonderful feeling. Happy New Year!
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I’m a little late but it’s still funny. I hope you had a good Christmas.
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Thanks, Robbie. Yes, v special with all the family and a nice break
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