Canine Philosophy

In these troubled times, I asked the house philosopher to pass on some of his accumulated wisdom and learnings…


1. If you leave it out it will get eaten.

2. Philosophising counts for little if there’s no chicken left.

3. If humans adopted a dog’s approach to greeting another, by checking out each other’s arses, they’d know, early on, which ones are completely up themselves.

4. If you had paws and a tail that wagged uncontrollably, you’d not develop a gambling addiction either.

5. Tap water is for sissies.


6. Live in the now: that ball won’t chase itself.

7. A lot of international conflict could be avoided if the UN installed a lot more lampposts and encouraged people to mark their territory.

8. Will someone please explain the point of cats?

9. On the eighth day, God created the lap.

10. Governments come and go, but a dog’s fart lingers.

Dog, and his often confused but keen-to-learn walking companion, wish everyone some peace and goodwill.

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published several books: a four book series following Harry Spittle as he grows from hapless student to hapless partner in a London law firm; four others in different genres; a book of poetry; four anthologies of short fiction; and a memoir of my mother. I have several more in the pipeline. I have been blogging regularly since 2014, on topic as diverse as: poetry based on famous poems; memories from my life; my garden; my dog; a whole variety of short fiction; my attempts at baking and food; travel and the consequent disasters; theatre, film and book reviews; and the occasional thought piece. Mostly it is whatever takes my fancy. I avoid politics, mostly, and religion, always. I don't mean to upset anyone but if I do, well, sorry and I suggest you go elsewhere. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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70 Responses to Canine Philosophy

  1. willowdot21 says:

    Thank you Geoff Dogs wisdom is much needed today ….and everyday 💜

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Number 7 takes the biscuit

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Steve Tanham says:

    Didn’t want to like it, but… loved it!

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Pam Lazos says:

    I love your dog. Except no. 8. I just can’t get behind that one. 🥰

    Liked by 3 people

  5. Number 10 is very appropriately numbered. However, I’m not sure that the stink emanating from number 10 has anything to do with dogs!

    Liked by 2 people

  6. noelleg44 says:

    Hugs and pets and treats to Dog for his boundless philosophy. The only reason we as humans don’t sniff each other’s butts is that our anal glands are shriveled! But our farts can be comparable.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. ThingsHelenLoves says:

    Dog is very wise. And handsome!

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Darlene says:

    This is just the best and just what we needed to hear today. Thanks, Dog and Geoff.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. joylennick says:

    Thank you Geoff, and your dog. As human beings, our needs are much more complicated.! It certainly made me smile! x.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Mick Canning says:

    Sound advice, Dog.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Wise one, Dog.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Erika says:

    Dog is amazing 😂

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Very astute. Loved 9.

    Liked by 2 people

    • TanGental says:

      You’re going to have to grow yours if your pup fills out to match his paws…


      • She’s going to be big Geoff. Maggie liked to sit on my lap in the car sometimes, but Maya is being brought up to sit in the boot behind a guard and is quite content. She likes to be close though, and my foot is just the right height for her head! Our neighbour hadn’t seen her for about a week and remarked how much she’d grown. We’ve had another good day with her today.

        Liked by 1 person

  14. Debbie says:

    Wise words indeed!

    Liked by 2 people

  15. Elizabeth says:

    Let me know when he runs for election here. I will definitely vote for him.

    Liked by 2 people

  16. Widdershins says:

    Your lede photo needs to be a giant poster, or at least a book cover! 😀 … Dog is wise! … except for the cat thing, but he may be a bit biased there. 😀

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Jennie says:

    Of course he is right on all counts. Delightful, Geoff!

    Liked by 2 people

  18. Didn’t Charles de Gaulle say “The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.”? 🙃

    Liked by 2 people

  19. Daedalus Lex says:

    Smart dog! I think he answers the age-old question in my favorite YouTube post of all time, “Do Dogs Have Brains?” :

    Liked by 1 person

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