In these troubled times, I asked the house philosopher to pass on some of his accumulated wisdomand learnings…
1. If you leave it out it will get eaten.
2. Philosophising counts for little if there’s no chicken left.
3. If humans adopted a dog’s approach to greeting another, by checking out each other’s arses, they’d know, early on, which ones are completely up themselves.
4. If you had paws and a tail that wagged uncontrollably, you’d not develop a gambling addiction either.
5. Tap water is for sissies.
6. Live in the now: that ball won’t chase itself.
7. A lot of international conflict could be avoided if the UN installed a lot more lampposts and encouraged people to mark their territory.
8. Will someone please explain the point of cats?
9. On the eighth day, God created the lap.
10. Governments come and go, but a dog’s fart lingers.
Dog, and his often confused but keen-to-learn walking companion, wish everyone some peace and goodwill.
My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published several books: a four book series following Harry Spittle as he grows from hapless student to hapless partner in a London law firm; four others in different genres; a book of poetry; four anthologies of short fiction; and a memoir of my mother. I have several more in the pipeline.
I have been blogging regularly since 2014, on topic as diverse as: poetry based on famous poems; memories from my life; my garden; my dog; a whole variety of short fiction; my attempts at baking and food; travel and the consequent disasters; theatre, film and book reviews; and the occasional thought piece. Mostly it is whatever takes my fancy.
I avoid politics, mostly, and religion, always. I don't mean to upset anyone but if I do, well, sorry and I suggest you go elsewhere.
These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
We have an unlikely harmony between Collie and Rag Doll cat… they even sleep together. I think the the secret was the cat was already installed and the dog came along as ‘her’ puppy…. Rather sweet!
Our cats (two sisters) were horrified when we introduced the first dog, then after he died and Dog appeared they couldn’t believe our duplicity. One of the sisters died in 2020 and the survivor is keeping up the tradition of ignoring
Yes, I like both cats and dogs, and love it when they coexist. My neighbour had a gorgeous old dog, and my cat just loved him. She definitely mourned when he died.
It’s only dogs view. We’ve had a long line of cats stretching back to our first pet in 1986. The current incumbent is universally known as the Dowager: ancient, sleeps a lot and complains loudly if not fed exactly when she wants it
Hugs and pets and treats to Dog for his boundless philosophy. The only reason we as humans don’t sniff each other’s butts is that our anal glands are shriveled! But our farts can be comparable.
So, our anal glands are sort of like our appendix then; they might have served a useful purpose back in the day? I wonder why we lost those little organs?
She’s going to be big Geoff. Maggie liked to sit on my lap in the car sometimes, but Maya is being brought up to sit in the boot behind a guard and is quite content. She likes to be close though, and my foot is just the right height for her head! Our neighbour hadn’t seen her for about a week and remarked how much she’d grown. We’ve had another good day with her today.
TanGental 
Thank you Geoff Dogs wisdom is much needed today ….and everyday 💜
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He is written a book on canine thinking in the post cat age…
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Excellent Ruby will definitely but a copy!!
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Thats one anyway!!
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I am sure it will be a huge success 🙂☺️🙂☺️
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Number 7 takes the biscuit
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Ho Ho!
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Wisdom, indeed!
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He’s our philosopher in residence.
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Didn’t want to like it, but… loved it!
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There you go… we can all overcome our instinctive prejudices, though I doubt Dog will ever give up wanting to eradicate cats
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We have an unlikely harmony between Collie and Rag Doll cat… they even sleep together. I think the the secret was the cat was already installed and the dog came along as ‘her’ puppy…. Rather sweet!
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Our cats (two sisters) were horrified when we introduced the first dog, then after he died and Dog appeared they couldn’t believe our duplicity. One of the sisters died in 2020 and the survivor is keeping up the tradition of ignoring
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Excellent!
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Same here. but, I shall reserve judgment, seeing as how certain attitudes towards felines has been expressed.
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We have a cat and a dog, Yvonne. They are equally loved, and, amazingly, they love each other and sleep together 😊
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Yes, I like both cats and dogs, and love it when they coexist. My neighbour had a gorgeous old dog, and my cat just loved him. She definitely mourned when he died.
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Our cat still just tolerates Dog but as she’s now beyond ancient she pretty much leaves him alone..
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Never managed that. Mostly the best we’ve achieved is a sort of malign indifference.
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Chuckles!
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It’s only dogs view. We’ve had a long line of cats stretching back to our first pet in 1986. The current incumbent is universally known as the Dowager: ancient, sleeps a lot and complains loudly if not fed exactly when she wants it
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I love your dog. Except no. 8. I just can’t get behind that one. 🥰
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Any of the others he is prepared to debate but he’s adamant cats should be cancelled…
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Humph.
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Number 10 is very appropriately numbered. However, I’m not sure that the stink emanating from number 10 has anything to do with dogs!
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We can’t really blame Dillyn can we
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Maybe his Dad!
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Hugs and pets and treats to Dog for his boundless philosophy. The only reason we as humans don’t sniff each other’s butts is that our anal glands are shriveled! But our farts can be comparable.
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I’m sure you meant well, Noelle but I’m now stuck with imagining shrivelled anal glands…
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Same here. Mind you, if they hadn’t, maybe we would all be scooting across the carpet/grass on our bums from time to time, as dogs do.
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Now that’s another pastime I can leave off my bucket list…
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This is what you get from teaching anatomy for 40 years!
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So, our anal glands are sort of like our appendix then; they might have served a useful purpose back in the day? I wonder why we lost those little organs?
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And, now I find we still have them!
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Someone invented shaking hands and that was that…
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Dog is very wise. And handsome!
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He says his feet will remain firmly on the ground except when the Amazon delivery guys appears…
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This is just the best and just what we needed to hear today. Thanks, Dog and Geoff.
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He’s very pleased with himself though he still refuses to engage with the cat. He’s fairly existential about her…
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Thank you Geoff, and your dog. As human beings, our needs are much more complicated.! It certainly made me smile! x.
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That’s all he wants. That and chicken…
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Sound advice, Dog.
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He does say much but when he does we all fall over in surprise.
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He needs to utter his gems more often.
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I’ll see what we can prise out of him
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Wise one, Dog.
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His degree in meat and biscuits has given him the ideal platform to launch himself
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A political future. Dog seems more qualified than most.
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His aspirations to lead the Lead Party remain undiminished
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😊
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Dog is amazing 😂
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He’s a canine Pooh Bear. Sometimes he sits and thinks and sometimes he just sits
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LOL!!
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Very astute. Loved 9.
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You’re going to have to grow yours if your pup fills out to match his paws…
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She’s going to be big Geoff. Maggie liked to sit on my lap in the car sometimes, but Maya is being brought up to sit in the boot behind a guard and is quite content. She likes to be close though, and my foot is just the right height for her head! Our neighbour hadn’t seen her for about a week and remarked how much she’d grown. We’ve had another good day with her today.
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Wise words indeed!
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His 14 years haven’t been wasted
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Let me know when he runs for election here. I will definitely vote for him.
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Woof!
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Polling looks promising!
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Your lede photo needs to be a giant poster, or at least a book cover! 😀 … Dog is wise! … except for the cat thing, but he may be a bit biased there. 😀
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He’s obsessed with how cats hold him back!
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Of course he is right on all counts. Delightful, Geoff!
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Quite the existentialist is Dog
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Yes, indeed!
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hi
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Didn’t Charles de Gaulle say “The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.”? 🙃
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I thought he just said ‘non’…
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Smart dog! I think he answers the age-old question in my favorite YouTube post of all time, “Do Dogs Have Brains?” : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPGptw8xObo
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