It’s A Marvel

‘What do you think?’

‘Lovely.’

‘The trunks? Not too…bulky?’

‘I’d say they suggest power.’

‘Not padding?’

‘Are they padded.’

‘Not… per se?’

‘What’s that mean? Most people, when they see the Bat will assume his costume is stretched because of the rippling muscles underneath…’

‘Not that he has to wear incontinence pads?’

‘Is that this issue here? Peeny-pads?’

‘It’s a bit embarrassing.’

‘We all get old, Batman. And being a Superhero is the ultimate young man’s game. Not even the centre can hold. Look at Spidey. His web’s lost its stick. And Thor? He can barely lift that bloody hammer, what with his knees and the RSI to his wrist.’

‘Superman’s still go it.’

‘Yes well, you have to remember he’s…. Erm…’

‘Foreign?’

‘Yes, there is that. It’s more that he was born to it.’

‘Sorry?’

‘Look, it’s a fact. Spidey was bitten so his immune system was compromised from the start, you started out as an indulged fop…’

‘Fop?’

‘Fairly Ordinary Person. And you’re more reliant on gadgets and an excess of gym work. Like Captain America and Iron man.’

‘Thor…’

‘Okay, I grant you, but he’s a one trick pony. If all you do is wave around a hammer that weighs the same as most planets, you’re going to suffer sometime. Superman has it in his blood and he does what comes naturally.’

‘So you don’t think anyone will notice?’

‘No, of course not. Though…’

‘Yes?’

‘Take a spare pair of trunks. You know, just in case…’

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published several books: a four book series following Harry Spittle as he grows from hapless student to hapless partner in a London law firm; four others in different genres; a book of poetry; four anthologies of short fiction; and a memoir of my mother. I have several more in the pipeline. I have been blogging regularly since 2014, on topic as diverse as: poetry based on famous poems; memories from my life; my garden; my dog; a whole variety of short fiction; my attempts at baking and food; travel and the consequent disasters; theatre, film and book reviews; and the occasional thought piece. Mostly it is whatever takes my fancy. I avoid politics, mostly, and religion, always. I don't mean to upset anyone but if I do, well, sorry and I suggest you go elsewhere. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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17 Responses to It’s A Marvel

  1. Sadje says:

    Poor Batman.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. This is so funny Geoff.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. pmsl…………! We all get old.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Erika says:

    I mean, we all get older 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. noelleg44 says:

    Your mind has wandered off to a funny, odd place again, Geoff!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. JT Twissel says:

    Not quite the sort of padding you want !

    Liked by 1 person

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