The Sage Of Wednesdays #writephoto #creativewriting #humour

Sue is back with another #writephoto prompt and this is my take

Gerald, The Sage of Wednesdays straightened his robe, adjusted his boxers against the inevitable abrasions that hessian guaranteed and did a few verbal warm ups. He stood just below the escarpment and out of sight of the Midweekists who he could hear humming with pent up anticipation. This was the biggy, the moment when he blessed the multitudes with the Word. His people had spent every moment since the previous year’s announcement, researching and market testing and focus grouping and seasoning and sifting to find what Word would provide guidance for the multitude. Over the years, the elected Sage provided the Word and the believers, the devout and the generally happy to go along with it for a quiet lifers took the Word and lived by it. It informed their actions, their decisions, their meal plans and their holiday destinations. They invested the savings by reference to it and they chose their life partners under its influence.

The last three days of the Midweekist’s convocation had debated the choices and determined the three possibilities. Since then, Gerald had retreated to the solitude of his shed to smoke a couple of joints and seek guidance for the Great Lexicographer as to which of the three should be this year’s Word.

It had been difficult. Troubling. A challenge. But he’d risen to it, even if the strain and tension had begun to get to him.

Roland waved at him and gave him the thumbs up. ‘We go live in…’ At this point Roland merely mouthed the countdown, ‘… five, four…’

As the countdown continued Gerald felt the hush ripple outwards and took the first of the three steps to the summit.

‘Three…’

Now the microphones had gone live and utter silence filled the valleys for miles around. Everything, every living thing waited on the Word.

‘Two…’

Something shifted, deep within the Sage’s fundamentals, a stirring of consequence which Gerald did his utmost to suppress. Just one more step, he told himself.

‘One…’

Gerald placed his bejewelled foot on summit and levered himself up. In so doing a greater strain was placed on the Sage’s sphincter than anticipated and a great rifting roaring fart was broadcast across the lands and into the homes of those unable to be present. Gerald looked at the sea of faces, no longer in awe but rather incredulous and articulated the Word that would have consequences that roiled across nations and changed the social structures and life chances of millions.

‘Bugger.’

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published four books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars, Salisbury Square and Buster & Moo. In addition I have published three anthologies of short stories and a memoir of my mother. More will appear soon. I will try and continue to blog regularly at geofflepard.com about whatever takes my fancy. I hope it does yours too. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
This entry was posted in #writephoto, creative writing, humour, miscellany and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to The Sage Of Wednesdays #writephoto #creativewriting #humour

  1. This one deserves thunderous acclaim

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Sue Vincent says:

    Ah, that’s why we are where we are at… 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. willowdot21 says:

    Very apt!
    It’s the end of the world as we know it 💜

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Pingback: Photo prompt round-up: Returning #writephoto | Sue Vincent's Daily Echo

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