The Relief Of Waterloo #poetry #worldtoiletday

As a small homage to those wonderful people the world over who provide us all with toilet facilities and in praise of World Toilet Day I give you my rewrite of After The Listeners, Walter de la Mare

Is there anybody there, said the traveller
To open up this loo?
It’s surely wrong that one must pay,
For our numbers one and two.

It’s not a function of the state
To limit where I go.
My body ain’t so politic
But it has some rights, you know.

If I’m caught, then my relief
Should be free at the point of use.
Just because the Exchequer’s bare,
To charge is no excuse.

It is a basic human right
This need to pee and poo;
The people’s stall and porcelain
Are for the many not the few.

Bladders come in big and small,
And bowels are many sized.
Open up the bloody lav,
Before I go cross-eyed.

If you enjoyed this you will find many more similarly inspired by great poets in my recent publication

The Sincerest Form Of Poetry

(Click the title to find your way to the buy links)

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published four books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars, Salisbury Square and Buster & Moo. In addition I have published three anthologies of short stories and a memoir of my mother. More will appear soon. I will try and continue to blog regularly at geofflepard.com about whatever takes my fancy. I hope it does yours too. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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7 Responses to The Relief Of Waterloo #poetry #worldtoiletday

  1. George says:

    Geoff for Poet Looreate!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wonderful trigger for all the times I’ve been in https://youtu.be/wTP2RUD_cL0

    Liked by 1 person

  3. willowdot21 says:

    One of my favourites! This day in celebration of all things toilet, has slipped passed me…. I am flushed with embarrassment 💜💜💜

    Liked by 1 person

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