I’ve penned some nonsense recently which I thought I’d share as we plunge into lockdown. It may amuse or instigate a groan…
Being part troll, Jane was excessively hairy
Which sad to relate made her naturally scary.
She tried depilation
But to her consternation She still looked more furball than fairy.
The naturist Alain Armistead
Brewed beer, in the nude, in his shed.
On his famed open days
He received special praise
Because he always displayed a good head.
I really must get off my chest
The terror that follows ‘be our guest’
In my wardrobe, I stare
Wondering what I should wear
The diamanté or the sequined string vest?
You don’t need to be a deep thinker
To realise that old man’s a stinker
When he leers at a girl
And makes her hair curl;
He’s not cool, just a bit of a winker.
For years, I could never find work
As my wink made everything jerk
But the prescribed medication
Has, to my consternation
Changed the wink to a continuous twerk.