Another poem based on one of the greats, this time After The Listeners by Walter de la Mare and in praise of the public toilet
‘Is there anybody there,’ said the traveller,
‘To open up this loo?
It’s surely wrong that one must pay,
For our numbers one and two.
‘It’s not a function of the state
To limit where I go.
My body ain’t so politic
But it has some rights, you know.
‘If I’m caught, then my relief
Should be free at the point of use.
Just because the Exchequer’s bare,
To charge is no excuse.
‘It is a basic human right,
This need to pee and poo;
The people’s stall and porcelain
Are for the many not the few.
‘Bladders come in big and small
And bowels are many sized.
Open up the bloody lav,
Before I go cross-eyed.’