The Lore Of Old Stone #writephoto

There is a theory that there are an infinite number of parallel worlds of which we are one. There are many such theories: our universe is constantly expanding; marmite is delicious; intelligent propelling pencils inhabit one of the other worlds; and Piers Morgan is an utter tit. Only one is completely provable. In fact there are some 26 parallel worlds in our corner of the cosmos and we are the fifth, sandwiched between Dearth and Fearth – the first E in Eearth is silent. Dearth, coming before us is like all big brothers: bigger, clumsier, inclined to ignore us and painful if approached unexpectedly.

The interactions between parallel worlds are rare but one sure sign is in the appearance of large unexplained phenomena. It is not yet understood how such phenomena pass between worlds but one theory turns on the concept of obfuscatory corruptions or more commonly the telling of huge whoppers to children to make them believe the universe is not the grim and grinding state of being we understand it to be shortly after we first grasp the concept of Mondays but instead is a place of abundant magic and endless excitement. Santa is one such corruption.

On Dearth Santa is the size of a town house and whose Ho Ho Hos would, if heard on Earth demolish Reading.

As, dear reader, you will gather from this piece, Magic in the sense of physical laws that few have yet worked out exists across the worlds. And a practitioner who can corral the impact of these unfound laws is called ‘magician’ or ‘sorcerer’ or ‘mystic’ whereas in truth he or she is just a clever clogs who’s got there before the rest of us.

Of course, these smarty pants want one thing more than any other – well apart from unconscionable wealth, an adoring public and regular sex – and that is for no one else to know what they know so the mystery is maintained.

Thus when anything appears to have arrived from Dearth it is the magicians who are most aware and who do their best to ensure either the remaining citizens remain in blissful ignorance or that such phenomena are explicable within the limited understanding of the Earth’s population of experts.

When next you come across what appears to be a set of irregular pock marked standing stones apparently miles from where they might have been quarried you will be told these are the churches of ancient people’s who, before hydraulics were invented and the wheel discovered managed to drag these buggers across the landscape when they couldn’t even download the second series of the Queen.

But really? Isn’t there something a tad far fetched about this? And why is it that a group of weirdy beardies spend all their time claiming these things as their own?

No, dear reader, hear the truth. These stones are the baby teeth of the young inhabitants of Dearth. Their parents, having conned them with the promise of a tooth fairy visit can’t be caught with these little mementoes. Instead they look to put them somewhere that the children will be sure never to find. In their little brother’s back yard.

Meanwhile the magicians of the world feel obliged to try and hide these phenomena if they can’t eradicate them. They spend years ducking and diving to avoid being caught while they practice their blasting spells – a simple harnessing of the excess of methane in the atmosphere – to make them look less like teeth and more like stones that some psychotically possessed ancient people who could barely pay the rent would give up a year’s growing kale and move them higher and yon.

Obvious really….

This is the latest response to the latest #writephoto prompt

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published four books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars, Salisbury Square and Buster & Moo. In addition I have published three anthologies of short stories and a memoir of my mother. More will appear soon. I will try and continue to blog regularly at geofflepard.com about whatever takes my fancy. I hope it does yours too. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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18 Responses to The Lore Of Old Stone #writephoto

  1. Sue Vincent says:

    It is a better explanation than some of the more mainstream ones 😉

    Like

  2. No doubt the other G loves this one

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Mick Canning says:

    Can’t think why we’ve never realised it.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. George says:

    Well that explains the stones but not Piers Morgan’s popularity. That is a mystery that may well be unknowable!

    I love the lateral leaps your imagination makes. This reminds me of a small aside in the Crow Road by Iain Banks, in which the central character recalls the stories his father told them when they were kids. When asked where the cairns on the hills came from, he told them how birds swallow pebbles and sharp pieces of grit and hold them in their gizzards to help them break down hard foods like seeds. When birds die, and their bodies decompose, they leave behind tiny piles of pebbles. Cairns are the same thing, but from the gizzards of dinosaurs.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. willowdot21 says:

    Well that makes it all as clear as ?…

    Liked by 1 person

  6. gordon759 says:

    And I ahd always thought they were an advertisement for mead

    Have a look at this; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q3B3qEPQA_M&list=PLN4gIEo2BjC1l_uKoBtSMh8HXTEOLpG7g&index=34

    At least it makes more sense than some theories

    Liked by 1 person

  7. noelleg44 says:

    Baby’s teeth, huh? Pretty darned imaginative, Geoff! I do agree Piers Morgan is a tit.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Rowena says:

    Geoff, this post made so much sense to me. I’m sure this phenomena explains where all the odd socks end up. There’s probably a parallel world with in between sized teeth and they use the socks as tooth covers. It also explains a lot of madness at our place, which I’m sure is repeated at homes all around the world, where you can find some mysterious object around the house, but then it suddenly reappears. You should explore this further and I can see a Nobel Prize of some description on your mantle piece alongside your published works.
    Best wishes,
    Ro

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Pingback: The Lore Of Old Stone ~ Geoff Le Pard #writephoto | Sue Vincent's Daily Echo

  10. Pingback: Photo prompt round-up: Presence #writephoto | Sue Vincent's Daily Echo

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