Poems, poems

Another poem based on a famous verse, treated with total disrespect. Do let me know what you think

Foreign Is Quite Ghastly

(Home Thoughts, From Abroad, Robert Browning)

Oh to be in England

Rather than ‘abroad’

To say travel broadens the mind

Is really quite absurd.

It’s dusty here, and full of smells

Against which the most robust rebels

And, God, the din the locals make

And don’t get me on what they boil and bake.

I’ll gift a kidney if you’ll just allow

Me back to England. Now!

The birds they have hereabouts

Have beady eyes and beaks of steel

And I really must confess my doubts:

These evil beasts cannot be real?

Back home in dear old Blighty

Our fluff balls are cute and flighty

And fill my soul with careless rapture.

Hearts should sing, they shouldn’t rupture.

I’ve got my ticket, I’m on my way

Back to England’s green gold shores

I’m done with ‘foreign’, outdone my stay

Take me home, to know-all bores

To potholed roads and warm flat beer

Just promise me please: get me outta here!

the pack dog….

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published four books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars, Salisbury Square and Buster & Moo. In addition I have published three anthologies of short stories and a memoir of my mother. More will appear soon. I will try and continue to blog regularly at geofflepard.com about whatever takes my fancy. I hope it does yours too. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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15 Responses to Poems, poems

  1. davidprosser says:

    Ever viewed with an irreverent eye Geoff. I shall never be able to listen to Clifford T. Ward’s Home Thoughts from Abroad without expecting your lyrics to appear.
    Hugs

    Like

  2. George says:

    Having lived in the North East for a number of years before heading west, this could easily be a Geordie lamenting their exile in Sunderland (well apart from the craving for warm flat beer). Excellent stuff, Geoff.

    Like

    • TanGental says:

      funny how many versions or ‘abroad’ there are … mind you having fallen foul, at Uni, of the Newcastle, Sunderland, Middlesborough dichotomy, lumping them all together as Geordies, I understand how close ‘foreign’ can be..

      Liked by 1 person

  3. willowdot21 says:

    Lol 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    Like

  4. Poor pack dog – he doesn’t even want to go ……. And truly this sounds like every discontented Pom immigrant who rocked up here in the 60’s and 70’s……….

    Like

  5. JT Twissel says:

    Ah the joys of returning home to the familiar although not entirely pastoral. A fun take on a flighty bit of fluff! Again, I prefer yours.

    Like

  6. There’s no place like home. Even with the bores, potholes, and warm beer. 🙂

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  7. noelleg44 says:

    The look on the dog says it all! I love traveling but coming home is always wonderful. Great take on the poetry but where is ‘abroad’ in this case?

    Like

  8. Your dog looks quite put out here. 😉 It’s true, no matter how rough, home is the best but you can keep the warm flat beer. Ice cold is the only way to drink it.

    Like

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