Resetting To Zero #storytime

Amber Trent sits in her chair and focuses on the garden. The wind of earlier has died away and the birds, sated on seeds are elsewhere. All is still and silent.

Amber Trent doesn’t move. She is replete, pain free and alert. Today her son Patrick will visit. His son will marry next year, he has told Amber and he will, she is sure tell her of the latest plans.

Amber Trent knows the other residents will be having tea later in the communal lounge and that they will be kind and understanding when she sits in the green winged chair.

Amber Trent wants nothing so much as to die. This room, this flat is her prison, its pleasantly decorated walls and personal knick-knacks reminders of a time when she had choices. Her escape is to the doctor’s or the hospital for kind, understanding people to take great care in humiliating her as they hunt a vein or insert a tube, compassionately extending her life for no purpose beyond the fact they can.

Amber Trent likes her little patch of garden and the insistent birds. But they don’t answer her questions and don’t stimulate her like Rodney once did. Patrick and his son, whose name will come to her shortly are kind and attentive but more absent than present. The residents and warden smile and nod but soon tire of Amber’s silence. Rodney used her silence as his backdrop; it created the auditorium for his soliloquys. Now that theatre is hushed but no longer expectant and all Amber wants is for the curtain to close.

Amber Trent knows people would wonder at her greatest wish, telling her what she has to live for. But they don’t see it as Amber sees it. The golden silence that makes up most of her day is, without Rodney, not just the absence of noise but the absence of hope.

Amber Trent is no longer still; her shoulders heave in silent sobs as a single tear slowly wends its way down her cheek.

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published several books: a four book series following Harry Spittle as he grows from hapless student to hapless partner in a London law firm; four others in different genres; a book of poetry; four anthologies of short fiction; and a memoir of my mother. I have several more in the pipeline. I have been blogging regularly since 2014, on topic as diverse as: poetry based on famous poems; memories from my life; my garden; my dog; a whole variety of short fiction; my attempts at baking and food; travel and the consequent disasters; theatre, film and book reviews; and the occasional thought piece. Mostly it is whatever takes my fancy. I avoid politics, mostly, and religion, always. I don't mean to upset anyone but if I do, well, sorry and I suggest you go elsewhere. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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12 Responses to Resetting To Zero #storytime

  1. Ritu says:

    Oh how sad 😢😟

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Darlene says:

    So sad. I really hope this is not how my mom feels. Sigh.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. willowdot21 says:

    Welcome back Geoff. This is so sad, and it scares me , really scares me 💜

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Mick Canning says:

    Very moving, Geoff.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. So sad Geoff and so true for so many.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sad story, Geoff. I think I’ll set up an eye blinking communication process that says, “Just shoot me.”

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Geoff, you nailed it: our sadness at aging alone, longing for death to relieve us of our emptiness and lack of purpose.

    I remember a time when our aging parents lived with or close to their family members. And this is still the case in many other cultures. Where did we go astray in housing our elders in separate homes and institutions?

    Liked by 1 person

  8. noelleg44 says:

    THe sorrow of aging along you have captured brilliantly – reminded me of the talks I used to have when I visited my grandmother. Unfortunately, it wasn’t often because she was in what was euphemistically called a rest home, very far from where I lived. I tried to call every week though – she lived to be 103, and starved herself to death, we think, at the end..

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Elizabeth says:

    A real tragedy to have no one who connects with her.


  10. 😥 Beautiful and sad.


  11. Wow. Really powerful Geoff. Thank you!


  12. You’ve stepped into a different pool I see and such ripples you made.
    Well done Geoff !


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