The Battle Of The Garden

It is spring; it’s lovely outside. And I’ve been in my garden.

I wrote this poem last year; obviously I was a little frustrated

If at any point my life seems drab and stale

My head begins to ache, my heart to harden

I open up my backdoor and go into my garden.

My gaze casts wide and never seems to fail

To find some joy and hopefulness

Amongst the verdant fruitfulness

But then alas, I spot the glitch, the little silver trail

Whose pretty zigzag wanderings

Will start some morbid ponderings

Could it be the bugger’s back? It’s beyond the pale

When you’ve spent so long in eradication

To see that shell is pure vexation

A battle won is not the war, o stubborn little snail

Beating you is a complete lost cause

I’m giving up; I’m off indoors.

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published several books: a four book series following Harry Spittle as he grows from hapless student to hapless partner in a London law firm; four others in different genres; a book of poetry; four anthologies of short fiction; and a memoir of my mother. I have several more in the pipeline. I have been blogging regularly since 2014, on topic as diverse as: poetry based on famous poems; memories from my life; my garden; my dog; a whole variety of short fiction; my attempts at baking and food; travel and the consequent disasters; theatre, film and book reviews; and the occasional thought piece. Mostly it is whatever takes my fancy. I avoid politics, mostly, and religion, always. I don't mean to upset anyone but if I do, well, sorry and I suggest you go elsewhere. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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45 Responses to The Battle Of The Garden

  1. Darlene says:

    I love your poem and your garden looks delightful. Looks like dog and cat enjoy it too! (the garden not the poem)

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Snails are real reasons to rage against the light of spring. Lovely pictures.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. willowdot21 says:

    You wooze Geoff, beaten by the little guys
    They are less trouble than bees and flies.
    Give the 🤪 little snails some beer
    They’ll drink and drown and your garden will be clear.
    Apart from that I need to say
    Your slide show has made my day.
    As for your poetic choice
    I hear in there your mother’s voice. 💜

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Gorgeous garden, Geoff. Nature always wins in spite of our best efforts. Mine is calling me to get to work but other things are more pressing this week. Maybe next.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. We had a cockroach invasion and had to get in the exterminators eventually, Geoff. Snails at least are outside.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Someone is doing a great job in maintaining your garden, Geoff. Beautiful.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. JT Twissel says:

    Oh my. Slugs and snails are the worst. But they add a bit delightful whimsy to your poem.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I quite like snails – in moderation – but really see no earthly use for slugs – flies have more reason for living than those slimy little critters. Garden is rather lovely!! Busy reading, nearly finished…. you’ll hear from me later today if all goes to plan.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. …and they make sure surreal splats when chucked against a wall.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Superb photos and poetry that is pure Le Pard senior

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Jennie says:


    Liked by 2 people

  12. Norah says:

    I hope all who enter your garden, enjoy it to the utmost (including spiral shells and silvery trails). Happy springtime!

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Elizabeth says:

    We had numerous slugs in our old gardens. We also got them drunk with empty tuna cans filled with beer scattered everywhere. One of your other comments advocates beer for snails too. They don’t seem to need expensive beer by the way!

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Karen says:

    Sweet poem and lovely photos! Thanks for sharing. I was just thinking about how my garden is both my bliss and my torment! I know how it can be a battle. But of course this is really the best time of year so hopefully you can enjoy. Cheers.

    Liked by 2 people

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