Never Trust A Man Who Knows His Pasta #microcosms #flashfiction

Posted on Dec 19, 2018 by TanGental

Melanie said he has a face for voice-overs but I said I thought him handsome. Rugged I said but she she’d seen turkeys with tighter jaws and in profile she thought him a touch scrotal.

He was very nice to me at dinner in Nice, though, last Tuesday. Held my chair like Reggie used to and suggested I’d probably not like the beef as it was French and they generally didn’t ‘do’ beef. After, he had that way that men of a certain type have, steering my elbow and making sure the taxi seat was clean.

We had a laugh when he realised he’d left his wallet in his cabin; apparently I’m now on a ‘promise’ when we reach Naples, tomorrow. He knows this little bar where they make their own penne, the way the Italians used to before the mafia lost control of the flour industry. He does tell amazing stories. Shocking some of them. I’m not surprised he’s had a lot of ‘encounters’ as he calls them – me, I only had Reggie and that was every last Sunday, unless it preceded the Bank Holidays and not at all after the hernia.

I did want to ask Melanie about that. She’s knowledgeable, you know. A bit ‘brassy’ as mother would have said but she’d know the etiquette, with worldly men. After all, that’s what happens on cruises, isn’t it? Not that I’ve ever had much time for it. Too much washing after.

Anyway, I think I’ll just pop along to his cabin and check if he’d like to do the bingo tonight. Melanie? No, I don’t know where she is. She said she’d speak to him for me, not that she likes him much, she said. I’ve not seen either of them since he went for his siesta.

This week’s Microcosm prompt threw up the following: Washed-up Actor, Mediterranean Cruise, Romance

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published several books: a four book series following Harry Spittle as he grows from hapless student to hapless partner in a London law firm; four others in different genres; a book of poetry; four anthologies of short fiction; and a memoir of my mother. I have several more in the pipeline. I have been blogging regularly since 2014, on topic as diverse as: poetry based on famous poems; memories from my life; my garden; my dog; a whole variety of short fiction; my attempts at baking and food; travel and the consequent disasters; theatre, film and book reviews; and the occasional thought piece. Mostly it is whatever takes my fancy. I avoid politics, mostly, and religion, always. I don't mean to upset anyone but if I do, well, sorry and I suggest you go elsewhere. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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16 Responses to Never Trust A Man Who Knows His Pasta #microcosms #flashfiction

  1. Rebecca Moon Ruark says:
    Dec 19, 2018 at 1:39 pm

    Ha! Great. You’re so good at answering these prompts!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ritu says:
    Dec 19, 2018 at 4:41 pm

    Loving your take!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. pensitivity101 says:
    Dec 19, 2018 at 6:36 pm

    ‘……………….not at all after the hernia’…………….. priceless Geoff.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. willowdot21 says:
    Dec 19, 2018 at 7:52 pm

    Well blow me down Geoff I know it’s good to let your readers use their imagination but really you knew what we’d all think!
    I loved it Geoff💜

    Liked by 1 person

  5. thecontentedcrafter says:
    Dec 19, 2018 at 8:17 pm

    and never trust a woman who declares a charmer charmless……….

    Liked by 1 person

  6. JT Twissel says:
    Dec 19, 2018 at 8:55 pm

    That’s a pretty complicated prompt but you did it! I was just reading about the relatively large number of people who get washed overboard on cruises.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. George says:
    Dec 20, 2018 at 7:45 am

    “she’d seen turkeys with tighter jaws and in profile she thought him a touch scrotal”—the most grotesquely brilliant description I’ve read for quite some time!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. derrickjknight says:
    Dec 20, 2018 at 10:53 am

    What’s pasta?

    Liked by 1 person

Comments are closed.