Jabberwocky by Lewis Carroll (Or Not) #poem #poetry

Scotland, specifically Edinburgh during the Fringe, is an inspiring place full of ideas and concepts, and not a few conceits. We saw things to make us wince, to stop the breath, to trigger tears and lots and lots of laughter. We also saw things that struggle to reach average and the occasional total bomb. But I don’t much care for the dross I caught because the upside more than outweighs the down. 

Thus I found myself inspired once again to utterly and completely ruin one of the Nation’s favourite poems. The Jabberwock.

‘Twas brillig and the slithy toves 

Did what Toves do, on wet Tuesdays

When men in spats were all ‘By Joves’

And lost their hats in various ways.

The rabbit tapped his watch and spat

‘Oh come on Charles, she’ll have a fit.’

‘She hates nonsense.’ He caught a hat

And ate the brim. ‘Now just you sit’

‘And write a verse about this cat’

‘Something deep that’ll stir her soul.’

‘Not talking shellfish and other crap’

‘Unless you’re happy in this rabbit hole.’

The pensmith sighed: ‘I’ve tried my best’

‘But with her there always is a catch.’

‘She wants her tea, with lemon zest’

‘And deep fried loin of bandersnatch.’

He tweedled his Dum and diddled his Dee

‘How can  I cook with no utensils.’

‘I’ve no skills in the kitchen, you see.’

‘The only tools I use are pencils.’

The rabbit chopped a homburg in three

‘Just add this with a pinch of stock

‘Then make a fire from the Tumtum tree’

‘And cook the lot in your jabber-wok.’

 And rabbit said as they left for home

Passing back through the looking glass

‘If you ever write me back there again

This vorpal blade’ll go right up your…’

I’ll end with a great mind – David Hume.

Now, I’m a man who thinks a fair bit about absurdities so, anyone, why are his toes so polished? Is this a Scottish thing? Or a philosophical thing? Or just a  thing?

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published four books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars, Salisbury Square and Buster & Moo. In addition I have published two anthologies of short stories, Life, in a Grain of Sand and Life in a Flash. More will appear soon, including a memoir of my mother's last years. I will try and continue to blog regularly at geofflepard.com about whatever takes my fancy. I hope it does yours too. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
This entry was posted in Edinburgh Fringe, miscellany, poems, poetry and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

20 Responses to Jabberwocky by Lewis Carroll (Or Not) #poem #poetry

  1. Mary Smith says:

    Perhaps people give his toes a pat? There was a bronze otter statue around here whose head was like gold because everyone who visited patted it.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. willowdot21 says:

    This little piggy!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I’ve seen this in other places, so it’s not just a scottish thing – though a specific scottish thing is Greyfriars Bobby whose nose is rubbed so much it gets damaged.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Ritu says:

    This was brill His Geoffleship!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. So funny, Hume’s toes caught my eye, too 🙂

    By the way, your book, Apprenticed to My Mother, arrived in the mail yesterday. Look forward to reading.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Yes, I think they play with his toes – must be a Scottish thing……. There’s a statue, somewhere in the nether reaches of Austria my memory says, though it may have been Italy – who is said to be helpful for infertility. He has a rather interesting burnished area. And to the poem, I thought your version an improvement on the original. You’re welcome!

    Liked by 2 people

  7. And hast thou slain our sensibilities?
    Flee from my feed, my pun-nish friend.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Thanks for the follow 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Rowena says:

    Geoffle, I’m not sure what to make of people rubbing toes. I’m sure we have nothing of the sort here in Australia. That must be why they play cricket.
    Best wishes,
    Ro

    Liked by 1 person

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