When Opportunity Rocks #writephoto #flashfiction

Sue Vincent’s #writephoto prompt this week is

‘Oh hi, I didn’t see you there. Is it ok to lie here for a bit?’

‘Sure. In a world of your own, are you?’

‘Yes, sorry. Things have been a bit, well, rocky.’

‘They usually are. For lumps like you.’

‘I’m not the first?’

‘Hardly.’

‘Have you been here long?’

‘At the last count? Maybe ten millennia, give or take a few eons.’

‘Wow! You are old. Makes me feel positively molten. What are you?’

‘A zircon.’

‘My mum talks about zircons. You’re, like, a billion or so.’

‘Four point…’

‘This is so cool.’

‘Is it? Are you here for the view? The sea air?’

‘I’m… Can I ask you a question?’

‘Of course.’

‘You see, I’m just a bit of granite…’

‘Yes, I can see.’

‘I’ve barely set…’

‘So you said.’

‘I’m having issues…’

‘No one takes you seriously?’

‘Exactly. They think I’m a flake. Just good for chippings.’

‘Girl stones?’

‘That’s it! It’s a bummer. No self-respecting girl slab so much as granulates near me. I’m getting pretty desperate.’

‘You need to give it time.’

‘Do you know how awful that sounds? I mean we’re not talking a couple of weeks mooching about, grinding a few pebbles into sand, are we?’

‘Well, no but if the alternative is self-gravellation…’

‘How did you know I wanted to smithereen myself?’

‘I’ve heard it before, son, many times. Why do you think I’m here, near these cliffs? If you add up the number of rocks I’ve persuaded not to avalanche you could make your own planet.’

‘So what do I do? How do I get some shiny piece of quartz to give me the time of day?’

‘You need a feature.’

‘Like an outcrop?’

‘Well, yes, but more,  erm, artificial.’

‘Seriously? I should get a carving?’

‘Believe me, it works. Here, roll me over.’

‘Wow? What is it?’

‘Hieroglyphics. Something about oxen and the moon. The point is if you tumble about in front of some smooth piece of crystalline crumpet and all you’ve got to show for it are a couple of crevasses and some novelty lichen, she’ll go all bedrock on you. But offer up a line of Chinese characters or, better still, some gaudy graffito and she’ll be phosphorescing for decades.’

‘Really?’

‘Really. Now why don’t you roll over there and let that sediment come and have a chat.’

‘Sure. And thanks.’

‘No problem. Hi, how are you?’

‘You don’t want to know.’

‘I do. Tell me about it’

‘I’ve been stuck in this depression for ages…’

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published four books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars, Salisbury Square and Buster & Moo. In addition I have published two anthologies of short stories, Life, in a Grain of Sand and Life in a Flash. More will appear soon, including a memoir of my mother's last years. I will try and continue to blog regularly at geofflepard.com about whatever takes my fancy. I hope it does yours too. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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40 Responses to When Opportunity Rocks #writephoto #flashfiction

  1. An excellent identification with the rocks and great play with words, especially the last line

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Sue Vincent says:

    I’m tol that the first few gigayears are the worst…

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ritu says:

    Love your take here His Geoffleship!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. 😀 Thanks for the funny wordplay!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Rowena says:

    Very funny, Geoffle.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. This was very amusing, Geoff.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. willowdot21 says:

    How do you think these things up Geoff, I saw fallen angels and you saw suicidal rocks and Samaritan boulders!

    Liked by 2 people

  8. janmalique says:

    I love your train of thought! Hope all went all with this issue, sigh, poor rock.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. rogershipp says:

    “If you add up the number of rocks I’ve persuaded not to avalanche you could make your own planet.’” My favorite line! Great job!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. A Petrological counsellor 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    • TanGental says:

      Ah now that is a word to roll around the tongue, realise you’ve accidentally tied it to your oesophagus and trebuchetted your larynx into your nose. The harm of the polysyllabic projectile can do…

      Like

  11. Rock on Geoff (someone had to say it!)

    Liked by 1 person

  12. LucciaGray says:

    Hilarious! I love your sense of humour.
    I don’t know why, because yours is just funny (or did I miss something?), but you flash reminded me of ‘Us’ by David Nicholls, which I’m now reading, the narrator is so funny and yet so poignant.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Pingback: Photo prompt round up – Fallen #writephoto | Sue Vincent's Daily Echo

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