By Royal Appointment #writephoto #flashfiction

Sue Vincent’s prompt this week is

‘Darling, it’s not green’ Darryl sneered as he shook the tension from his shoulders ‘It’s Verdant Blush complimented by The Venus of Moss Extractions.’ He turned away. ‘Green, indeed. She’d never accept just green.’

Primrose Trefoil peered at the cascading rocks and the, to her, clearly green coverings still dripping following the outflow of the water. ‘Why does she want to change it, anyway?’

Darryl scribbled his signature on the thigh of a flunky and turned back to Primrose. ‘Each new season means a new landscape for her Royalness. Last year it was a glacial melt, two years ago we had to find two million virgin’s tears for her bath and believe me there aren’t many of those anymore.’


‘Virgins. This year she’s gone all post traditional and want’s a Classical seascape. All craggy granite and scalloped stacks.’ He glanced around to check on prying ears and whispered, ‘If you ask me it’s because she’s such a wrinkled old hag she wants to Court to look the same after they’ve spent three months in salt water.’ He put his hands on his hips, and sighed. ‘You know, those carpets look very life-like. You’d not think they were manufactured, would you? Like real seaweed.’

‘Isn’t it?’

‘Silly girl. Of course not. This is all put together by an elite task force of elves. I gave them the spec and they built it.’

‘Why did they drain it then?’

‘I suppose they were testing it for leaks.’

‘And all the fish they removed first.’

For the first time, Darryl looked unsure. ‘Another test, I suppose?’ He turned to another flunky, hissing, ‘Get me that bloody elvish contractor. Now.’ He turned back to Primrose. ‘It hardly matters anyway. I mean who’d care if we drained a real cove…’

Just then there was shout. Darryl and Primrose looked towards the sea where the tide had recently gone out. ‘Oi. You? The one with the clipboard and rotating hips. Did you authorize the draining of my resting pool?’

The speaker was a magnificent woman with yards of glorious blond hair, determined and forthright breasts, with a long fish tail held in one hand and a glinting trident in the other.

Darryl had gone pale.  ‘That’s not a mermaid, is it? What do you think she’s planning with that fork thing.’

Primrose stood to one side as the mermaid began to chase Darryl up the cliff path. ‘I think they call it a three-pronged attack.’

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published four books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars, Salisbury Square and Buster & Moo. In addition I have published two anthologies of short stories, Life, in a Grain of Sand and Life in a Flash. More will appear soon, including a memoir of my mother's last years. I will try and continue to blog regularly at about whatever takes my fancy. I hope it does yours too. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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26 Responses to By Royal Appointment #writephoto #flashfiction

  1. Allie P. says:

    “Verdant Blush complimented by The Venus of Moss Extractions” is brilliant.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. barbtaub says:

    HaHa! Loved this

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Charli Mills says:

    Such everlasting and verdant humor, green indeed!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Sue Vincent says:

    Nice…though it may open theage-old question of ‘how’ where the mermaid is concerned… 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Iain Kelly says:

    Ha, great imagination. Very entertaining.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Pingback: By Royal Appointment #writephoto #flashfiction  – Geoff LePard | Sue Vincent's Daily Echo

  7. Pingback: Photo prompt round-up – Ebb – #writephoto | Sue Vincent's Daily Echo

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