Top 10 Lessons from 2016 #Caninephilosophy

mylo-11. If you leave it out it will get eaten.

2. Brexit means little if there’s no chicken left.

3. If humans adopted a dog’s approach to greeting another, by checking out each other’s arses, they’d know, early on, which ones are completely up themselves.

4. If you had paws and a tail that wagged uncontrollably, you’d not develop a gambling addiction either.

5. Tap water is for sissies.

mylo-3

6. Live in the now: that ball won’t chase itself.

7. A lot of international conflict could be avoided if the UN installed a lot more lampposts and encouraged people to mark their territory.

8. Will someone please explain the point of cats?

9. On the eighth day, God created the lap.

10. Governments come and go, but a dog’s fart lingers.

Dog, and his often confused but keen-to-learn walking companion, wish everyone a splendiferous 2017.

mylo-4

Happy new year, kind and generous readers.

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published three books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars and Salisbury Square. In addition I published an anthology of short stories, Life, in a Grain of Sand this summer. A fourth book will be out soon. This started life as a novel in a week on this blog and will follow later this year. I blog about all sorts at geofflepard.com and welcome all comments. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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53 Responses to Top 10 Lessons from 2016 #Caninephilosophy

  1. Living in a household run by cats, we can relate. I’m speaking on behalf of Dog too who never steals anything that’s left out, mainly because the cats have always got there first.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ritu says:

    Wonderful! Though Sonu Singh is wondering about the point of dogs lol!!!
    Happy new year His Geoffleship!!!! 🍾🍾🍾

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Happy New Year Geoff.
    Do love points 6 and 9!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. barbtaub says:

    So SO fabulous! (I think you’re onto something with #7…)

    Happy New Year!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. willowdot21 says:

    Thank you for your wisdom Dog….. Number one rings true .. leaving a mince pie out cost us Β£200 !! But Ruby is worth it as you probably know!! Please tell your owner he is one of the kindest people I have met and can you wish him and all his family a happy and healthy 2017! ❀

    Liked by 2 people

  6. floridaborne says:

    Ah, but there is a point to cats.

    Dogs teach us how to love unconditionally, and cats help us practice what we’ve learned. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Happy New Year Geoff and Dog and may we wish you many happy walks throughout 2017!
    Love the opening and closing photos. #3 is a common mantra of ours πŸ˜€ Sidd and his Muma

    Liked by 1 person

  8. πŸ˜„ . Happy New Year to Textiliste, Geoff and all the gang!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Charli Mills says:

    There’s an Indigenous American take about dog’s and their greetings. It says dog’s sniff each other’s hind ends to find their leader. They have not found the leader yet. Great wisdom from Dog, as always, twisted humor from you! Happy New Year to you and your family, canine included, of course.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Anabel Marsh says:

    Happy New Year, Geoff!

    Like

  11. jan says:

    Haha! I can see who your master is! Cats are good for producing hair balls and making it necessary to vacuum twice a week. Other than that – you’ve got me! Happy New Year Geoff!

    Like

  12. wordwool says:

    The silence of your canine Confucious during the referendum campaign was a heavy blow to the cause of good sense. I trust your new year will not be dogged by the adversity of continued reticence on his (?) part…….

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Eileen says:

    Wonderful as always. Delightful writing and marvelous photos.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Rachel M says:

    Haha I love that first pic with dog at the table.

    Liked by 1 person

    • TanGental says:

      There’s something of the Dutch Master about it don’t you think

      Liked by 2 people

      • Rowena says:

        You should enter it into a photography competitition. It definitely has a timeless classic look about it. Absolutely loved it!!..and the others.
        I think your dog needs to have a chat with Lady and talk some sense into her. Indeed, you might need to give her a transplant. She’s been rather busy lately what with eating the Christmas Cake and fireworks terrors last night. Perhaps, hypnosis might help!
        Happy New Year!
        I cleaned in and out of the fridge today. Don’t know if that’s going to lead to greatness this year but it’s a lateral approach for me.
        You’d be proud of me tonight. I go to a pentecostal Church and our head Pastor is Darlene Zschech http://darlenezschech.com/ who is an international singer/songwriter who has also written quite a few books. Needless to say, I have pondered outing my writing to Darlene but that really intimidated me until a guy I’ve known for years talked about how he showed Darlene a song he was working on and how encouraging she was and so I have started inching my way out of my cave. Well, I wrote a poem tonight at Church and went up to her at the end of the service and gave it to her on a piece of paper torn out of my norebook. I’ve spoken to her a few times lately and it felt very natural. I’ve been trying to bridge the gap between my blog and real lives lately. So, interesting to see what if anything comes out of this. I simply gave it to her…a gift. No contact details on it. Well see…
        You could say that’s an auspicious start to the New Year…better than a clean fridge!
        Best wishes,
        Ro

        Liked by 1 person

      • TanGental says:

        i agree, great to move from the cave and frankly a clean fridge is just so last year. Happy new year to you too and as for the photo it does deserve better because there is something oddly timeless about it

        Liked by 1 person

      • Rowena says:

        I hope you don’t mind but I’d love to print the photo out and stick it up on my filing cabinet beside my desk. Not quite the same as getting to the Blogger’s Bash but n the way perhaps.

        Liked by 1 person

      • TanGental says:

        Of course. If a jpeg emailed would give a better quality let me know.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Rowena says:

        That would be great, Geoff. As you could imagine, I’m quite fussy about photography!
        xx Ro

        Liked by 1 person

  15. We need to pay attention to dogs – they have it all figured out, apart from perhaps no. 8… being a cat lover too… That one was a bit wicked but not unexpected! Happy New Year Geoff, your posts continue to entertain and keep us smiling, and wagging our tails if we could!! … πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  16. At last, we get the sensible one talking!

    Happy New Year, Geoff – hope it’s a great one for you and your family

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Sacha Black says:

    7 is hilarious – can you imagine them all sat around pissing up lampposts!

    Like

  18. lucciagray says:

    Mind boggling lessons, GeoffπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Norah says:

    Ha! Wonderful Geoff! Happy New Year!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Annecdotist says:

    Thanks to the dog for sharing his philosophy, but what does he drink if he doesn’t drink tap water – or is he after the coffee in your mug?
    Happy New Year, Geoff

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Ali Isaac says:

    We can certainly learn a lot from our canine companions… such words of wisdom! Have a happy 2017, Geoffle!

    Liked by 1 person

  22. #3 and #5! πŸ˜‚ LMAO! Happy New Year, Geoff. (Fantastic pictures, by the way.) 🐢❀️

    Liked by 1 person

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