@1000speak #1000speak What is love?

This month, the #1000 Voices for Compassion has an optional theme prompt of love. It shouldn’t be difficult to write about love, should it?

But it is. For me. I love lots of things: people, places, experiences, stuff… And therein lies the problem. Such an all encompassing word, that I attach to so much it devalues it.

What we need is an Eskimo approach: you know, they are meant to have 200 words, or some such, for every version of frozen water. Slice and dice it and then we will have, in amongst the likes and enjoys and lusts a real meaning for it.

What I need to do here is reverse engineer this. I’m not looking at it the right way round. It’s not what love means for me but what do I want it to mean. How do I want to define it? Limit it.

It is easy to look at those intense first moments when you fall for someone as being the most visceral expression of love. True love. Pure love. It’s breathless, heart racing, painful, glorious, exhausting. Part is the novelty, part is the fear – of giving of yourself, of the downside, of losing it. You have to take a lot on trust.

And sure that was fun and I have happy memories. But I don’t forget the gnawing uncertainties that accompanied those passionate moments.

No this for me isn’t where love is best expressed. It’s expressed in the long term, the build up of trust, the quiet everyday. The shared look, the unspoken understandings that come with time. It finds itself in longuers that need no conversation. If one has an instinctive, a forgiving compassion for another, it’s likely to come from a shared view. That to me is where love, pure and uncomplicated resides.

This love is not strident, it is not loud or indeed passionate. It can be experienced in boredom as much as joy. It’s pleasure is in just being.

It runs deep, but it is never still. It surges like a tide but never breaks like a wave.

If you are lucky enough to grow into this with another, then you are to be envied.

This is part of the 1000 Voices. Please visit the blog here. Or post your posts here


About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published four books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars, Salisbury Square and Buster & Moo. In addition I have published two anthologies of short stories, Life, in a Grain of Sand and Life in a Flash. More will appear soon, including a memoir of my mother's last years. I will try and continue to blog regularly at geofflepard.com about whatever takes my fancy. I hope it does yours too. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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16 Responses to @1000speak #1000speak What is love?

  1. FlorenceT says:

    Beautiful post. I find ‘love’ – the word is overused. šŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. A perfect description

    Liked by 1 person

  3. trifflepudling says:

    That was lovely. There was this film “How to make an American Quilt”, with a stellar female cast (including Kate Nelligan!), and the quilt the quilting bee was making was called “Where love resides”. They all had different takes on where and what it was, and these were sewn into the quilt. Thanks for reminding me of it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • TanGental says:

      I Had thought I’d replied but apparently not! Thank you Gilly. I’m not sure having thought about it, if I’ve seen that film. I will have to look out for it.


  4. Love is very much in the ordinary, the everyday. Particularly with romantic relationships, too much emphasis is placed on the passion & intensity of the start – then it becomes hard to accept when the relationship progresses to a deeper connection.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. As you say, Geoff, there are lots of variations on this thing called love. Personally, I don’t think I could define it as clearly as you have here. Left me pondering….


  6. Yvonne says:

    It is interesting, isn’t it, how we use one word to mean so many things? And bizarre, really. There’s a huge difference between what many people call love, and which is really passion mixed with wanting approval, and the kind of love you describe – that longterm deeper version.
    And then, there’s yet another kind of love, the kind that just is, that feeling that’s almost indescribable, but that we keep trying to describe. Recently I heard it described as knowing that when you look at another person, you are really looking at yourself – because we are all one. So love it sensing this. And yes, just being is a good way to describe that too!

    Liked by 1 person

    • TanGental says:

      Thanks Yvonne. Yes there are those sublime moments when nothing is needed, no one sense is employed to understand that connection. It’s not so much a sixth sense as a coalescing of all senses.


  7. herheadache says:

    Simply, stunningly beautiful.
    It is a different experience for each one of us, which makes it so hard to define. It is over-used, the word, but the feeling is never unwelcome when it occurs.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Ritu says:

    Love your words here His Geoffleship. Love as a word is overused that’s for sure. It loses its sheen for some. But that long lasting love, that enduring feeling doesn’t really need a label… it just needs to be… šŸ’œ

    Liked by 1 person

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