Our crack team ended day two with a musical. 11.35 is a tough time to start, especially pm. Still, onwards and upwards…
Get Your Shit Together
This musical was written acted and sung by a committed and talented troop. The humour, the neat mix of emotions, the energy all made for a compelling hour’s entertainment.
The Vet: ‘So good. Loved everyone.’
Garfunkel: ‘Which one was Pam?’
The Vet: ‘You’re obsessed.’
Garfunkel: ‘But in a good way.’
The Big Bite Sized Breakfast – Round two
After yesterday I hoped for better. 6 playlets today.
Man bonds with duck. Duck becomes bezzie. Man rejects duck when career looms. Themes around identity and avian bonding.
Man meets woman in hotel room. Man divorced after wife’s affair. Woman prostitute? Woman’s husband appears. He’s the cuckhold. Man and man fight. Cuckhold dies. Woman grateful. Man leaves with promise to meet again. All done in single words. Neat if utterly implausible.
Aggressive woman trains timid woman to sell lemon scented dishcloth. A little funny.
Woman joins man at bus stop. Offers to kiss him. She only enjoys first kisses. She keeps a list. Man hesitant but eventually agrees, hoping to persuade her seconds are better. Doesn’t work. She doesn’t even say where he rates. Nicely done.
Man with no sense of touch meets woman with no taste. His lack of empathy contrasts with her oversensitivity. Unexpected bond ensues. Best of the group.
Cate Blanchett wants to be Bazza’s friend on Facebook. Bazza doesn’t trust her. Sort of sad commentary on celebrities needing to be fed fame. But hard on La Blanchett.
Garfunkel. ‘They were both rats.’
The Vet: ‘I hated the duck story.’
Garfunkel: ‘He was a rat too.’
The Vet. ‘I know. Rats and ducks don’t mix. We learnt that in the second year.’
Garfunkel:’Will the duck be ok?’
The Vet: ‘She’ll need rejection counselling.’
Garfunkel: ‘Do you do that?’
The Vet: ‘In my final year.’
Garfunkel: ‘Maybe you can help Pam too.’
I went on my own. This was about the immorality of tax havens. It had done a season in London at the Bush. The reviews were mixed. Like Marmite. But it starred Caroline Horton and I’ve seen her before twice and she was excellent so I ignored the reviews and went. This was… Odd. If Faust and Russell Brand had an affair after an acid trip, they might have given birth to this. It was a mix of sound bites, surrealism and sadism. Allegorical and scatological in equal measure, it had victims where the crimes weren’t victimless and gods as capricious as a teenage cloud burst. In one word? Incoherent. I enjoyed the seamless nonsense and mental violence in the way I enjoy watching the patterns rain makes on the windscreen while waiting at traffic lights. I really hated the sort of rape scene that was nothing but gratuitous but then so was the rest of it if I’m honest. I’m not sure what to think beyond both the financial sector and its critics have sick minds and limited morals, though probably different morals.
Meanwhile the Textiliste went to a patchwork exhibition at the Dovecote Centre and the Vet and Garfunkel went to see
Captain Morgan and the Sands of Time
Two men, and a musician. They re-enacted a pirate tale with 40 characters. The captain was one.
The Vet: ‘The musician was gorge’
Garfunkel: ‘Pam would have loved him.’
The Vet: ‘He can tap my tambourine.’
Moving on swiftly to the last Textiliste pick, we tried
Backstage at Biscuitland
And finally this was it, the BIG ONE, the one that worked for everyone. Jess Thom has Tourette’s. The hour was a manic madcap explanation of the verbal and physical ticks that affect someone with the condition. It is a neurological disorder on a spectrum and mostly known from those whose verbal ticks are swearing. Jess’ mostly common verbal ticks are ‘biscuit’ and ‘hedgehog’ currently but we also had ‘Alan’ ‘I love Cats’ and, yes, a variety of swearing based ones. She was manic, humorous, self deprecating, surreal, extraordinary and, basically a lovely well adjusted person suffering stupendously with this condition. It was an hour learning about acceptance: hers of her condition, ours of her and others like her who disturb our accepted peace without any choice. A plea for empathy and tolerance. If you can see her somewhere, do. It makes you cry, it picks you up and says, ‘you know what? It might be hard but together, life is good.’
The Vet and Garfunkel: ‘Bloody Biscuit Brilliant!!’
And really, that was it. We did do another couple of shows but Biscuit was so good we needed to end there. I may have suggested this year’s selection weren’t great and, yes, we did do a couple of dogs but Labels and Backstage in Biscuitland were exactly what makes Edinburgh exhausting and exhilarating. You think, you engage, you come out a little bit more aware: in short it reminds you to be alive.