The End of the (Blogging) World is Nigh – Bish Bosh Bash #bloggersbash

Some say I’m a doom monger, others that I’m prescient, a sooth-person. Tomorrow those Four Bloggers of the Apocalypse will have their cummupence. Have you seen this?

envelopes

They pretend these harmless envelopes contain the names of award winners but you know what they are? They’re the first chosen to be sacrificed for their dastardly plans. These Innocents will be taken on a journey like no other. They will be genre-whipped, character-clipped and have their narrative arcs stripped bare. And then offered a T shirt for six quid and a sweaty hug.

But there is hope. You see I’ve built an animatronic Geoffle. A Trojan Hamster. There are a few technical issues t resolve. The faux beard hasn’t worked out as I hoped – it’s a bit, hmm… But by tomorrow I will be able to merge into the background; no one will spot me.

I know what you’re thinking. How will you know it’s me so you can rally to the cause? Easy. Approach the nearest Geoffle – there will be a lot around, wandering aimlessly looking for people who’ll listen to them go on about their new book. Ask:

Is that cake free?

If it’s me, I will answer:

Free the cake from blogging oppression!

The real Geoffles will try and give you a delicious square; they’d drugged with goodness and healthy ingredients.

Join me and

WE SHALL OVERCOME

Remember we need lots of applause. They absolutely hate praise and goodwill. We will clap their dirty schemes to dust.

Remember

British Library 11 am and after Pizza Express 12.30.

Please help. One brave member has already tried to send a help message and they did this to him.

IMG_20150731_174326

Be afraid, be very afraid.

Supreme Commander (self-styled) of The BOOB Elite


About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published three books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars and Salisbury Square. In addition I published an anthology of short stories, Life, in a Grain of Sand this summer. A fourth book will be out soon. This started life as a novel in a week on this blog and will follow later this year. I blog about all sorts at geofflepard.com and welcome all comments. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
This entry was posted in Annual Bloggers' Bash, miscellany and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

24 Responses to The End of the (Blogging) World is Nigh – Bish Bosh Bash #bloggersbash

  1. Sacha Black says:

    You are literally the funniest person I know. I can’t wait to meet you tomorrow geoffle! 😊😊

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Ali Isaac says:

    Ah but Geoffle, that Sacha has had a bottle of rose, and you know what that does to her… Keep an eye on her tomorrow.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: Stream of Conciousness Saturday: Will you be Ready? | willowdot21

  4. willowdot21 says:

    How did it go !! I demand to know!! will be there next time!!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Norah says:

    I look forward to hearing all about it! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Pingback: IF WE WERE HAVING COFFEE: Kidnapping, Garden Produce ,Geese, | willowdot21

  7. Charli Mills says:

    If that beard is problematic, Geoffle, try threading! 😀 You are spreading more fun than doom!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I don’t think your plan worked and the famous four took over London on Saturday. Back to the drawing board, Geoff? 🙂

    P.S – You really should have have won the funniest blog award. I’m already to nominate you for it next year.

    Liked by 1 person

    • TanGental says:

      No I think the result were right. Mind you my daughter gave me grief that I didn’t tell the family to go around procuring votes. I tried to say the point was for people who actually read the blog to vote rather than one of her girlfriends but she was having none if it.

      Liked by 1 person

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