A warning: The ABBA’s are everywhere and they’ve got to be stopped

Remember this?

blog award

It hasn’t gone away. I did warn you of this new threat to peace and harmony in the Blogsphere. A subversive group, a self-selected gang of four have infiltrated our blogs with their ABBAs. They say it stands for the

Annual Blogger’s Bash Awards

Is that likely? Really it is? I can reveal its true meaning is

All Bloggers Be Afraid

They are out to undermine our privacy. They want us to meet! To share ideas. To enjoy each other’s company. As if we were actual human beings, capable of such normal interactions.Β I mean, if we were, would we blog? If we could talk to people FACE TO FACE don’t you think we would?

Have you noticed? These blogpolice are everywhere: tweeting and hashtagging; they are calling for recruits. As I warned a small select advanced party are planning on a get together on 1st August under cover of the British Library’s courtyard. Rumours of a Blog d’Etat cannot be ruled out at this stage.

They have a uniform so their misguided recruits will know them. They say they will each have their names

2015-07-09 16.58.25

see how he glows? Of course he can’t be human. Most likely he is an android with a nuclear battery.

But I suspect it is a front. Even if it looks like a back.

They have devised a secret way of signalling – apparently they have a code using only their eyebrows – check them out on the day: you will be astonished. That and the nails. Do not look directly at the nails or you will be enslaved.

While I try and corral those of us who WANT THIS STOPPED, I need your help. You see they are cunning. They are running a vote. They have even advertised it here. I don’t think they realise the power we have. If we bombard them with votes, their machinery is sure to collapse under the weight of our

Morally Important Negativing of the Gang’s Β Empire-Building

or

M.I.N.G.E.

for short. Crash their plans with thousands of votes. Infringe the Minge and make them Cringe.

When I have formulated our strategy for the day I will let you know. If you can come along on the 1st with a view to disrupting their devious scheming, do please join in. You never know: you may be able to take away one of their hideous uniforms and hang it as a warning to others. Only Β£6.

And remember our slogan

BACK OFF OUR BLOGS

They may have their ABBAs

But we have our BOOBs

About TanGental

My name is Geoff Le Pard. Once I was a lawyer; now I am a writer. I've published three books - Dead Flies and Sherry Trifle, My Father and Other Liars and Salisbury Square. In addition I published an anthology of short stories, Life, in a Grain of Sand this summer. A fourth book will be out soon. This started life as a novel in a week on this blog and will follow later this year. I blog about all sorts at geofflepard.com and welcome all comments. These are my thoughts and no one else is to blame. If you want to nab anything I post, please acknowledge where it came from.
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34 Responses to A warning: The ABBA’s are everywhere and they’ve got to be stopped

  1. Sue Vincent says:

    Reblogged this on Daily Echo and commented:
    From ABBAs to BOOBs… they can’t be stopped…
    Don’t forget to vote for your favourite blogs over at Sacha’s event page!
    http://sachablack.co.uk/2015/07/16/voting-now-open-annual-bloggers-bash-awards/

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Bahahaha! M.I.N.G.E. Yes, I have the mind and sense of humour of a fourteen year old boy and found that bloody hilarious!!!

    Fabulous post, although I’m going to have Dancing Queen in my head repeatedly today now. I blame you…

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Jack Eason says:

    Reblogged this on Have We Had Help? and commented:
    Bloggers beware πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Reblogged this on Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog and commented:
    Consider yourselves to be thoroughly warned πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„

    Liked by 2 people

  5. noelleg44 says:

    Never MINGE! I did vote and told Ali to salute you all from me at this subterranean and secret [ πŸ˜‰ ] meeting.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Reblogged this on Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life and commented:
    Whilst you may be misled by the title of this post… A Warning the ABBAS are everywhere and they’ve got to be stopped… beware it was written by an undercover agent posing as a concerned blogger.. It is a honey trap intended to get you to vote for the Annual Boggers Bash Awards.. Geoff you really should be more subtle.. but nice try!

    Liked by 2 people

  7. esthernewton says:

    Just wondered if your nails will be as sparkly as Sacha’s, Geoff?

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I wonder who these four are? I thought ‘Abba’ was part of a name of several towns in Wales? Since then I have discovered that the Welsh now use the letters ‘e’ and ‘r’ after ‘ABB’ as the second ‘A’ was stolen by one of the gang . They are holding the second ‘A’ to ransom and we must pay in Welsh cakes and lava bread. I think this could be a case for Miss Maple!

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Ali Isaac says:

    Geoffle Geoffle, full of waffle! Love the post!

    Liked by 3 people

  10. jan says:

    Haha! You tell them! I’m so sorry to miss all the fun!

    Liked by 3 people

  11. Geoff you absolute nutter! I think your mission about the BOOBS might just succeed at the ABBAS. I have every faith in you and will be monitoring your progress through FAT (Facebook and Twitter)!

    Liked by 2 people

  12. macjam47 says:

    Haha! Very entertaining.

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Hilarious! I mean, “This is serious folks! Boobs unite!”

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Can we pay on the day?

    Liked by 1 person

  15. You just got me with this one. I read it, loved it – and I’m following your blog now. Your own fault. LOL

    Liked by 1 person

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